Conventional wisdom: Some people are born bad, some nice.
✔ Reality: Psychos are among us, pray your kids are not included.
Empathy, simply put, is the ability to put one’s self in someone else's situation or shoes as they say, and feel or imagine to feel what that person is experiencing. Of course, this is impossible. You cannot become blind, injured, sickly, ugly, or change your race, so you cannot totally experience what they experience. What you can do, is think about it, talk with your kids, and not dismiss others as no concern of yours. Have you ever heard someone say, “Why should I care?” They are not really asking you to explain why they should care, they are making a simple statement of fact, that they don’t care. That is lack of empathy.
You should want your kids to be empathetic; it is one of our more human traits. ✔History’s worst psychopaths had no empathy. On that sobering thought, research suggests that empathy comes with our kids as part of the package at birth, but we can do lots to enhance it, including role modeling.
Below is a list of actions to watch for, forbid, discuss, reinforce, point out as wrong or right, learn from, etc. etc. As you discuss these topics with your children, ask them questions such as, “what would you do?” and “why?”
Possible empathy teaching moments
“Ask kids, what would you do?” and “why?”
1. Name calling in all its many faces.
2. Teasing that becomes mean and hurtful.
3. Animal cruelty
4. Bullying
5. Exclusivity (excluding some, including others in games, or
activities
6. Volunteering and charity giving
7. Offering a helping hand, opening doors, being helpful
8. Being respectful of all things, including people
9. Showing consideration
10. Saying nice things or not at all
11. Learning to listen
12. Judgmental thinking
13. Interest in others
14. Compassion
15. Listening
16. Discrimination
17. Prejudice
18. Curiosity
19. Always about me
20. Selfishness
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