20 Impulse Control and Your Child

Conventional wisdom:    They are just impulsive kids, what’s the big deal?

✔Reality:   It is a huge life changing deal and parents ignore the consequences 

Researchers have definitely  connected the dots and drawn solid conclusions from  the original Stanford University marshmallow test, and many similar follow up studies.  As parents, we need to cut to the chase and initiate positive proven practical parenting.  Here is a list of what we think we know for sure.
1. Impulsive actions are generally not desirable.
2. Children that are unable to delay gratification have more issues as a rule.
3. When these children grow up they still have more issues.
4. Health, weight, financial, marriage, mental health, and the list goes on to the point it is impossible to deny a child isn’t better off learning some basic self control, even a little impulse control learned late in life is better than none.
5. ✔We know impulse control may be learned.   We know that self control, delayed gratification, critical thinking, restraint, willpower, composure, temperance, moderation, and a long list of other synonyms may be taught, and will benefit  children, tweens, and adults.
6. We know these desirable and undesirable traits are easily emulated, taught, and learned at home, work, at school and in every part of day to day living.
What can you do? 
This may be harder for the parent than the child, but you must teach your child how to act by following your good example.

● Stop all snap decisions, learn to sleep on it, and explain to your children why you are waiting a day, week or more to decide.

● Learn to show your own self control.  Don’t yell, lash out or speak harshly when things don’t go the way you want.

● Quit eating snacks, show some restraint.   Fat parents make fat children, but worse yet, they develop diabetes and heart disease when they get older.

● Learn to say no and be resolute no matter how big the tantrum.
● If you smoke, quit.  If you drink a six pack of soda, beer, or any other indulgence each night, think of how your child looks at your action.  Does weak, spineless, low will power, lacking in self-control come to mind?  How about addictive behavior?  

✔If this line of thinking is irritating to you,  good, it means you are considering these written words.  There are few things in parenting that will have a greater affect over the course of a child's life than setting an example to follow.  Notice it could be a good or bad example, that’s your choice to make, but you are the example they copy more than any other, and to that end you have no choice.  Impulsive behavior is not a model for good parenting.